Golden child insists that her sister pitch $1000 to their dad's 70th birthday party at the last minute, gets pouty when she's stuck with the bill: 'We feel blindsided and ambushed'

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Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
Mar 26, 2025 3:00 PM EDT

Even if you love and adore your parents, cherishing them dearly and holding them close every family holiday, $1000 is still pretty steep for a partial contribution for a birthday party. A non-negligible thousand bucks is something most regular folks need to plan for, but the golden child sister in this next story seemed to think otherwise. 

This older sibling got ambushed by her sister when she demanded she pitches $1000 for dear ol' Dad's 70th birthday. However, at the last minute, a grand in cash was a big ask—especially when the GC sibling was the only one involved in planning decisions. 

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  • Most golden children don't realize they're their parent's favorite. Often living a life of luxury and getting away with whatever they want without punishment, they grow into a sense of entitlement that's hard to shake. For the sibling who's NOT the golden child, jealousy and contempt are hard to stave away, but many manage. Like the sister in this next story, who knew her younger sibling was mom and dad's favorite, but was still flabbergasted to find out that her sibling was planning a 70th birthday party for their father that was egregiously out of budget—and that didn't even include the cake and gifts.

  • Cheezburger Image 10485350400
    via trilocks

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "AITA for refusing to finance my dad's 70th birthday?"

    My dad is turning 70 in December this year and it's almost April now. My sister and mum have made all arrangements without asking for my input/opinion, etc. 2 days after we returned from my husbands 40th
    via WorldlyHumor6342
  • birthday holiday overseas, my sister requested $500-$1000 to contribute. Side note: none of my family sent so much as a message to him with birthday wishes. I politely advised it wasn't in our finances as we have many big milestones this year. My
    via WorldlyHumor6342
  • sister went silent, and I eventually asked if she was still there. She slowly said she was and that she was 'biting her tongue' so as not to start an argument with me. I then cheerily said 'ok, goodnight' and hung up... AITA? Thank you for your perspective, dear internet
    via WorldlyHumor6342
  • Cheezburger Image 10485350912
    via trilocks

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • MisaOEB NTA for saying no. Believe me, having organised loads of "special aged" birthdays, you come up with ideas and ask for feedback and budget limited before coming to final decisions etc. So how they have been doing it is not good and you're entitled to your no.
    via MisaOEB
  • However, it's not clear if you were aware of the plans before the request for money. Because if you were, you should have given feedback in advance say this sounds expensive, I might not have the cash etc.
    via MisaOEB
  • Also, are you willing to contribute anything? You don't have to, you can always not get him something or get him something outside of what the others want to do. But how you ended the call may cause hurt.
    via MisaOEB
  • WorldlyHumor6342 OP We will be treating dad to a thoughtful gift no matter what. We were made aware of the party plans and decisions in the sentence before my mum and sister asked for money. We just feel blindsided and ambushed by my sister and mum. My dad is not the type for a big shindig like this, he would be happy with sharing a meal at the pub with his nearest and dearest. Yes, ending the call like that may cause hurt but guilt-tripping us also stings. In time, we will talk about it kindly
    via WorldlyHumor6342
  • OkStrength5245 NTA may i make the hypothesis your sister is the golden child? WorldlyHumor6342 OP You certainly may. She is also the insecure gatekeeper
    via OkStrength5245
  • Younggod9 NTA They made all the decisions without you so they can cover the costs without you. It's not your job to fund something you had no say in especially when they couldn't even acknowledge your husband's birthday. Their poor planning isn't your emergency
    via Younggod9
  • JustAnotherOlive NTA. They didn't bother to wish your husband a happy birthday, they didn't involve you in the planning of your dad's birthday, they assumed they could demand money.. and then got salty when
    via JustAnotherOlive
  • you politely explained your finances didn't allow it? That's pretty awful behaviour and you should feel no guilt at all for declining to let them use you.
    via JustAnotherOlive
  • Profess... NTA - a pretty basic rule if you want eople to contribute towrds the cost of something is that you discuss it with thim in advance and agree a budget, beofre you commit to any expenditure.
    via Profess
  • I think that it would be open to you to offer a smaller contribution if you want and feel it is worth it for family relations or if you would have planned to spend some money on your dad and are willing to spend that as a contribution to the party instead.
    via Profess
  • you can also consider whether you think it would be at all useful to send a message to your sister and mum saying something like; "I was really taken aback when you asked me for $500-$1,000 out of the blue, towards Dad's birthday
    via Profess
  • celebrations. We hadn't had any previous conversations or discussions about planning, or setting a budget, and as I knew you were making some plans but you hadn't chosen to involve me to ask me whether or how much I
    via Profess
  • might be able to contribute, I naturally assumed that you had already budgetted for what you were plannning. I admit that I did feel a little hurt yhst you chose to exclude me, but despite that, I'm not necessarily averse to contributing to family events in future but do ask, moving forward,
    via Profess
  • that you make sure that I'm involved from the start, so we can make sure that we're all in agreement about a budget and what everyone is able to afford, and that plans are agreed by everyone contributing, before any financial decisions or bookings are made so that no one is blind sided or excluded"
    via Profess
  • alexmack667 NTA, they don't get to demand money from people for things they planned with no prior consultation.
    via alexmack667
  • Thyres76 NTA. You if they cook it up without you they gotta accept if you don't wanna chip in. BTW, what a range, 500 1000? This by itself is very - fishy IMO. Don't let them guilt trip you.
    via Thyres76
  • Cumisha Jones NTAH .Pretty easy, let them know your husband had a great 40th just in case they didn't remember and you both are not their bank
    via Cumisha Jones
  • notevenapro NTA, a milestone birthday should have the input of all that are being requested to chip in. FYI. When I hit 70 I would be happy if people just showed up. Barbeque? Potluck? Who cares. Just want to see my kids.
    via notevenapro
  • Pebble-hunter NTA, if my sister and mother did that, I wouldn't have been as polite as you I would've just said off spending my money and go spend your own
    via Pebble-hunter
  • theoldman-1313 ΝΤΑ I think that your sister has been given a valuable lesson in communication and planning. Only time will tell if she is capable of learning. You on the other hand handled it perfectly.
    via theoldman-1313

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family drama dads famiies drama kids brother birthday siblings moms parenting Party dad story family sibling sister stories parent payback mom money cousins parents
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